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Also known as, "but you're too pretty to be gay! In deepening my relationships with femmes, I learned what relationship models worked best for me—and how to balance the romantic and platonic relationships I have with others, even in seeing platonic relationships evolve to become intimate friendships. From my vantage, there are a few different kinds of femmes and types they seek. As much as we get overlooked due to femme invisibility, we're also staring at the other feminine girl in the lesbian bar wondering if she's a lady lover or just a straight ally.